Row 46 ... and 52 and...

I have NEVER hated a project more than this one!

I am thisclose to ripping the whole damned thing out and giving it up. I've done frustrated projects before. I've cursed sweaters that weren't working the way I wanted them to. I've wondered WTF many a time but I've never felt this hopeless before.

My first night with the Diamond Fantasy Shawl started off a little rocky but I finished the chart A in one night and fely ok. Yesterday I started chart B and was plugging along until ROW 46. I HATE the ROW. I curse that freaking row. I ripped that row too many times to count. In the end I fudged it a bit here and there because ripping out rows of lace only seems makes a bigger mess than when you started - and completed chart B for the first time.

I thought my trouble was over and cruised though the chart for a second time earlier today. It was all good! I started the chart again and got past the dreaded row 46 and thought I was home free. Piece of cake! No problem! Looking good! Then as I got to the end of row 52 I realized that I didn't have enough stitches. After about 3 hours my DH suggested some sock therapy. He pointed out, correctly, that I knit for relaxation and I am definitely NOT RELAXED NOW. I am frustrated, upset, tense, and I want to cry. I can't let this fucking shawl defeat me! I don't see many big lace projects in my future.

Anyway, Bruce's suggestion was a good one and I cast on for Stinkerbelle's socks. I'm still not sure I love the color of this yarn but I'm feeling happier with this than with the shawl. Just starting the sock is soothing. I'm feeling better already.

What about the shawl? Tomorrow is another day and, one that I'll be spending at home since the schools here will be closed. Between crafts projects, preparing treats for V-day parties at school, and kicking my daughters butts in various games I will be trying to tame the Shawl From Hell.